The Funniest Stuff My Kids Said in 2012

I had so much fun compiling last year's list of funny comments that I thought we'd have a reprise!  So... without further ado and with absolutely no prioritizing( I couldn't pick my faves), here are our Funniest Comments of the Year along with some of my favorite snapshots from 2012:

1.  Tori burst into the kitchen and exclaimed, " I'm gonna be a big sister!" And I said, " I don't think so." 

Daphne said, "You'll never get the chance, Tori. But don't worry. It's much harder to be the middle child." 

Puzzled, I said, " Says who?" Daphne replied, matter-of-factly,
 "I do. I've experienced it."  (Feb 2012)

2.   I put some music on for the girls downstairs... (a tv channel that plays music.) so they could have a dance party.  I was heading upstairs to wash dishes and I said,"Daphne, come get me if it starts plays raunchy songs."  Daphne looked at me with a slightly condescending face and said,
" Do you mean come and get you if it plays inappropriate music?" (Feb. 2012)

3.  Victoria and I were snuggling on the couch next to Matt and I asked her where she got her beautiful hair and her beautiful eyes.  She looked at me and said, "God did it."  I said, "Of course he did!  But did you also know that you have hair just like Daddy did when he was little?  And your eyes look just like his? " 

 Tori said, "So Dad helped God make me?"  

And I answered, "Well, Yeah, in a way"... and tried to explain a bit.

  After a minute Tori looked at Matt and said, "Did you go up to God and say, 'Are these the bum pieces?'     so you could help put me together?"  (March 24th 2012)

(See?  They don't ALWAYS fight.)

4.  Isaac and Daphne were fighting for about the 50th time today and Daphne screamed at Isaac, "You don't care about anyone but yourself!"   Isaac replied somewhat calmly,

  "I care about everyone but you."

(Okay, so that also could have made the list for the meanest things they said in 2012, but I don't make on eof those and it was pretty funny after the fact.)

(April 2012)

5.   I tried a new recipe, which was a complete disaster.  

No one liked it.  

Isaac asked, "What's this called?"   "Teriyaki Chicken.", I answered.

Without skipping a beat, Tori exclaims,
"I LOVE this!  It's TORI yaki chicken!"  (June 2012)

6. I really like the Elementary School in our neighborhood.  There is, however, a particular Kindergarten teacher who I do not want any of my children to have. (Mrs. Rigby)  She will actually take the children's work (little 5 year olds!)  and if she deems it unsatisfactory, will rip it up in front of the class.  True Story.  

Anyway, they had a Kindergarten round up recently and this teacher made some comments that were particularly disconcerting to me.  Namely, she said that, "School is about work.  We don't have fun and we don't share.  We only share in our hearts."  (Why the heck is she teaching little kids?!)  Anyway,  we were driving along  I was discussing this with Matt and the big kids and explaining why I really want Tori to go to another Kindergarten or have the other teacher.   Shortly thereafter, a song by Hilary Weeks song comes on the radio.  It's called "You Have a Song to Sing".

Daphne (as usual) asks, "What's this about?"

I explain that some of the lyrics say, "You have a song to sing, you have a story to tell... there is a destiny that only you can fulfill.  So if you're wandering, just put your trust in Him.  He'll give you a song to sing."  I tell them that everyone has a purpose and God cares about each of us, so she should feel important.  

Isaac says "Because she's important to God."

Daphne:"Yeah, Everyone is important to God."

Then Tori pipes up, "Yeah.  Even Mrs. Rigsby."

(August 2012)

7.   My kids play this obnoxious game in the car called, "Dibs".  Essentially, they see a car that they like and they yell, "Dibs that Corvette!" or whatever.  At first, it seemed like a fun way to keep them entertained, but then it just became one more thing to quarrel about, i.e.: "I saw that first!"  (As if it matters whether you both dibs a car into your imaginary "Dibs account".)  That's Isaac's terminology, by the way.  (Not the imaginary part.)  Every now and then he'll say something like, "I have 25 mustangs in my Dibs Account.  Seriously.

Anyway, so we're driving down the road one hot Summer day and Daphne says, " I see 1 naked guy"  (which to my children means a man jogging or biking with no shirt).

 And my precious little Tori Grace ( in her best Hubba- Hubba voice) says, 

" I dibs him!"

8. Something incredible has happened here in Utah: We now have decent BBQ!  In August, a Dickey's BBQ opened about 30 minutes from us and now we have one about 5 minutes away as well.  We stopped in for our first visit and walked into the door and  Victoria says, "It smells like Texas in here!"
That's my girl!  (August 2012)

9.  While watching the Republican National Convention, Victoria randomly pipes up: 

"I don't like Americans.  I only like Texans!"

(September 2012)

10.  Tori walked up to me at the grocery store and said, " Mom, I love you."  

"I love you too, Tori Grace."

Victoria answered back, "Do you know why I love you?

Because you have all the ingredients to make Pumpkin Bread... Can we make Pumpkin Bread when we get home?"

(October 2012)

11. Victoria:

"Mom, You know what?  Even when I go on Time Out, you love me."

I answer: "Of course I do."

Tori:  "Even when you're mad at me, you love me.

Because you always, always love me."

(Long Pause before she continues)

" Until I'm a grown up."

(November 2012)

12.  Victoria was having a DUM DUM sucker during Church.  She sorted through the suckers and found a grape one, and knowing that this is Matt's favorite flavor, gave it to him.  He pretended to eat it with the wrapper on.  But Victoria grabbed it out of his hand and said, 

"Take the wrapper off , Dum Dum!

Dear Isaac, Daphne and Victoria, 

I wish I could describe to you how much joy you bring to my life; and not just with your clever comments.  You are honestly the brightest parts of my life; I cannot comprehend me without you and I'm not sure I was me until you each grew inside me.  You are the most precious and delightful creatures and I thank God every day for you all.  I love you and look forward to a 2013 full of laughter. 

Love, Mom